The wife told me to talk to her like she was special the other day. So I said, 'gooooo ... annddd ... makkee ... meeee ... a ... cuuuppp ... offffff ... coofffeeeeeee ...'
A traveling salesman rings this doorbell. 10 year old little Johnny opens, holding a beer and smoking a fat cigar. The salesman says, "Little boy is your mother home?" Little Johnny taps his ash on the carpet and says, "What do you think?"
There was three people approaching the gates of heaven But there was only one place left.The gate keeper asked the first man what happened to him because the one with the worst death would go inn.the first man said: "Well imagine that I expected my wife was having an affair, so I got home early to surprise her. I found her in the bathroom with a towel round her so I knew she wasn't having a shower so I search the apartment and found 10 fingers hanging from the window sill. So I started bashing away at them. When he fell god must have loved him, because he lived. So I threw a refrigerator at him. After all the excitement I died of a heart attack." That's horrific said the gate keeper, he asked the second man how he died and he said. "Well imagine this I was riding one of those stationary bike on the top of our apartment building but it went wrong I feel down and grabbed some ones window sill. Then some idiot started bashing ar my fingers then I fell but god must have loved me because i lived then -SHANNOOOWWWW- a refrigerator plunged down at me" That is to horrific. he asked the third man how he died and he said. "Well imagine that I was naked in a refrigerator......."
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11 » Family jokes
