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  • 566 » Best and Different Funny Jokes, Comic & Humor


    These are supposedly actual signs that have appeared at various locations. On a New York convalescent home: "For the sick and tired of the Episcopal Church." On a Maine shop: "Our motto is to give our customers the lowest possible prices and workmanship." At a number of military bases: "Restricted to unauthorized personnel." On a display of "I love you only" Valentine cards: "Now available in multi-packs." In the window of a Kentucky appliance store: "Don't kill your wife. Let our washing machine do the dirty work." In a funeral parlor: "Ask about our layaway plan." In a clothing store: "Wonderful bargains for men with 16 and 17 necks." In a Tacoma, Washington men's clothing store: "15 men's wool suits, $10. They won't last an hour!" On a shopping mall marquee: "Archery Tournament-Ears pierced"

    2009/08/02 01:00 - Sunday » jokes, dirty jokes, clean jokes, humor, comic

  • 567 » Best and Different Funny Jokes, Comic & Humor


    These are supposedly actual signs that have appeared at various locations. Outside a country shop: "We buy junk and sell antiques." In the window of an Oregon store: "Why go elsewhere and be cheated when you can come here?" In a Maine restaurant: "Open 7 days a week and weekends." In the vestry of a New England church: "Will the last person to leave please see that the perpetual light is extinguished." In a Pennsylvania cemetery: "Persons are prohibited from picking flowers from any but their own graves." On a roller coaster: "Watch your head." On the grounds of a public school: "No trespassing without permission." On a Tennessee highway: "When this sign is under water, this road is impassable." In front of a New Hampshire car wash: "If you can't read this, it's time to wash your car."

    2009/08/02 01:00 - Sunday » jokes, dirty jokes, clean jokes, humor, comic

  • 568 » Best and Different Funny Jokes, Comic & Humor


    These are supposedly actual signs that have appeared at various locations. Sign in a realtor's office: "Lots for little." Sign in a shoe store: "Come in and have a fit." Sign in a maternity clothes store: "We are open on labor day." Sign in a non-smoking area: "If we see you smoking we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action." Sign on the door of the maternity ward: "Push Push Push." Sign at entrance of the IRS: "Watch your step." Sign at the exit of the IRS: "Watch your mouth." Sign in a bookstore: "We treat you write." Sign on a front door: "Everyone on the premises is a vegetarian except the dog."

    2009/08/02 01:00 - Sunday » jokes, dirty jokes, clean jokes, humor, comic

  • 569 » Best and Different Funny Jokes, Comic & Humor


    These are supposedly actual signs that have appeared at various locations. Sign on a scientist's door: "Gone fission." Sign in a taxidermist's window: "We really know our stuff." Sign in a podiatrist's window: "Time wounds all heels." Sign in a butcher's window: "Let me meat your needs." Sign on used car lot: "Second hand cars in first crash condition." Sign on fence: "Salesmen welcome. Dog food is expensive." Sign in a car dealership office: "The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment." Sign over a cannibal's hut: "I never met a man I didn't like." Sign in a muffler shop: "No appointment necessary. We'll hear you coming."

    2009/08/02 01:00 - Sunday » jokes, dirty jokes, clean jokes, humor, comic

  • 570 » Best and Different Funny Jokes, Comic & Humor


    These are supposedly actual signs that have appeared at various locations. Sign at a hotel. "Help! We need inn-experienced people." Sign in a science teacher's room: "If it moves, it's biology. If it stinks, it's chemistry. If it doesn't work, it's physics." Sign in butchers window: "Pleased to meat you." Sign on auto body shop: "May we have the next dents?" Sign at the dry cleaner's window: "Drop your pants here." Sign on a parking space at a garden nursery: "Reserved for plant manager." Sign in an Acapulco Hotel: "The manager has personally passed all the water served here." Sign in a Norwegian lounge: "Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar." Sign on a door to a psychiatric ward: "Please do not disturb further."

    2009/08/02 01:00 - Sunday » jokes, dirty jokes, clean jokes, humor, comic

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