A man and a woman were waiting in line at the hospital donation center. Man: 'What are you doing here today?' Woman: 'Oh, I'm here to donate some blood. They're going to give me Rs. 200 for it.' Man: 'Hmm, that's interesting. I'm here to donate sperm, myself. But they pay me Rs. 1000.' The woman looked thoughtful for a moment and they chatted some more before going their separate ways. Several months later, the same man and woman meet again in the same line. Man: 'Hi there! Here to donate blood again?' Woman: (shaking her head with mouth closed) 'Unh unh.'
A blonde was involved in a serious crash; there's blood everywhere. She's rushed to the hospital where she's put on a stretcher almost unconcious. Doctor: OK, I'm going to check if you're concussed. Blonde: Ok. Doctor: Ok the how many fingers am I putting up? Blonde: Oh my god I'm paralysed from the waist down!
It was rush hour and the bus was packed. One particularly cramped woman turned to the man behind her and said, 'Sir, if you don't stop poking me with your thing, I'm going to the cops!' 'I don't know what you're talking about miss - that's just my pay check in my pocket.' 'Oh really,' she spat. 'Then you must have some job, because that's the fifth raise you've had in the last half hour!'
A worried father confronted his blonde daughter one night. 'I don't like that new boyfriend, he's rough and common and bloody stupid!' 'Oh no, Daddy,' the daughter replied, 'He's ever so clever, we've only been going out nine weeks and he's cured me of that illness I used to get once a month.'
A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her daughter walks in. 'Mother, where do babies come from?' The mother thinks for a few seconds and says, 'Well dear, Mommy and Daddy fall in love and get married. One night they go into their bedroom, they kiss and hug and have sex.' The daughter looks puzzled so the mother continues, 'That means the daddy puts his penis in the mommys vagina. Thats how you get a baby, honey.' The child seems to comprehend. 'Oh, I see, but the other night when I came into your room you had daddys penis in your mouth. What do you get when you do that?' 'Jewelry, my dear. Jewelry.'
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